My Love
by Moment For Life
Summary: A one-shot of Violet and Harry; their story as the ship hits the berg.


They say that when you become a Mother, your life changes; a woman emerges.

Twenty-two-year-old Violet was already a wife to a wonderful man, Harry.

A sob sounded and she knew this time it had come from her. Her teeth chattered beyond her own control, beyond her own recognition. The cold bit at her bare, un-gloved hands, her breath a cloud of fog around her face. Wide, startled eyes watched the Titanic, around a hundred feet away begin to rise into the air, the bow slowly been claimed by the cruel Atlantic Ocean. Screams sounded, hundreds of them merging together to make one haunted hymn. The sharp intakes of breath, the sobs of those who surrounded her seeped into her ears. She dared to open her eyes just to see them; Mother's held onto their children, women watching as their husband, their father or sons had stayed on a sinking ship. None knew their fate. Violet didn't know Harry's.

Just hours earlier they had enjoyed dinner, wine and they had danced; just as young lovers did. Harry had told her with his deep, dark sparkling eyes just how much he adored her and their daughter Sylvia. The way he had spoken to her had brought tears to her eyes. She loved him also, more than anything. As they had begun the walk back to their state room on B deck where their four-month-old daughter had been sound asleep been watched by the faithful nanny, they had both felt a sharp shudder which had even caused Violet to lose her balance, she had gripped her husband's arm as they descended the staircase. Others, if they noticed, continued along with their evening and so they had done the same, they had, after all, consumed wine that evening.

A sharp movement within her arms disturbed Violet. Through blurred and teary eyes, she pulled the bundle in her arms further into her body. Sylvia opened her eyes, those large brown beautiful eyes, topped with thick lashes. A smile came across her face, revealing bare gums. The same smile she did each time she would awake to her parent's face. She was oblivious to this world. Violet's tear fell on her daughter's cheek and she wiped it away ever so gently.

"Oh, my girl." She sobbed into her daughter's chest, burying her face in the layers of blankets which she had fetched to ensure her daughter was warm.

Once Violet and Harry had reached their stateroom, they had relieved their nanny of her duty and both parents had watched over their sleeping child. Her breathing had been deep, just like it was when she slept heavily, her rosebud lips open a fraction and her tiny hands balled into a fist beneath the blankets.

''It is so very cold this evening,'' she had commented to her husband, ''please fetch another blanket. I do not wish her to feel the chill.''

Her daughter felt warm to touch, but the room felt cooler than before. The walk back from dinner up on the deck had chilled Violet to the bone. Harry returned with a thick blanket for their daughter. He carefully placed it around his daughters sleeping body and tucked the ends into the cot. They took last glances before heading back into the sitting room and leaving the door open just a fraction.

''Perhaps we should turn in.'' Harry noted the time on the clock above the mantelpiece. Almost midnight. ''I suspect Sylvia will be needing nursing in the next few hours.''

''No, not just yet.'' Violet placed her hands on her husband's chest. ''It isn't so often we have quiet.''

Harry saw how his wife's eyes sparkled. Those pale blue eyes he had first laid eyes on at the London gallery when she had been just eighteen years old. Her mother, beside her, as well as her four sisters; each a year apart in age, with very similar striking looks; pale blue eyes and fair hair but it had been Violet who had robbed him of his breath right there and then. They had danced all evening and were engaged within three months.

''You are right,'' he smirked, his face so handsome. His lips came towards her slowly and she melted beneath him. ''Perhaps this advantage is one to be taken.''

She shushed him as she returned his kiss ever so gently. In two years of marriage, and a child, their passion had not melted and in fact it seemed to be slightly wilder. A knock sounding at the door interrupted their passionate embrace and immediately Harry straightened out his jacket and ran a quick hand through his hair.

''Good grief, whoever would call at this hour.''

The knock sounded again this time louder, more urgent. Violent, sighed in annoyance and immediately went to check that their daughter had not been woken by the disturbance.

Harry opened the door, his face showing his irritation. ''Yes?'' He snapped, coming face to face with a finely dressed steward in his outerwear.

''I am sorry for the intrusion, sir, but we have stuck ice and the Captain has ordered for everyone to go up on decks immediately. It is cold, I suggest top coats, hats and gloves.''

Harry laughed, feeling the need for a brandy. ''I assume this is a well written joke? We have an infant, I will not be taking my wife and daughter out on decks without necessary need. Is it a serious collision?''

The steward shook his head. ''I think not, but it is Captains orders.'' The steward's eyes told Harry that he didn't have a clue what was going on. In the corridor, people were taking leisurely walks, dressed in evening wear heading back to their stateroom. One man held a block of ice, laughing wearing his pyjamas. No sign of damned emergency.

''Oh, Heaven's sake. I shall find out myself.''

He closed the door as the steward walked off to the next stateroom.

Violet's eyes questioned. ''Ice?''

''Yes, a berg apparently.''

''Of course. That will be the shudder we felt.''

Harry furrowed his brow. He hadn't even put the two together. ''Hmm, perhaps. The Captain had ordered we go up on decks immediately.''

''Immediately?'' A cloud crossed Violet's eyes. Harry came to her, placing his crooked right index finger below her chin.

''Darling, you needn't worry.''

His eyes told her that it was going to be all right.

''Now, I shall gather up our coats and hats, you go nurse Sylvia and dress her warmly.'' Violet nodded. ''These people better have good reason for our child been awoken and taken in to the cold at such a damned hour.'' He had grumbled.

Of course, she hadn't known just how serious the collision had been...

She had been slowly singing a lullaby, rocking her daughter over and over to get her back to sleep. Anything to shield her eyes. As she glanced down through her misty eyes, she saw how peaceful her daughter was. Asleep. She pulled the blanket further across her cheek and buried the child's face in hers. ''My baby.'' She whispered. ''It will all be over soon.' She dared to look back at the ship which had once felt safe and warm and how it was almost claimed entirely by the water.

Violet had donned a top coat over her evening wear and that was it. After nursing Sylvia, they had gone up on decks to find out what the matter was. Lifeboats were been prepared to lower, officers running around like headless chickens and Thomas Andrews was overlooking it all. Most passengers were in the dining room, or inside. The band played their fine music. Harry cast his head to see through the window; his friends were drinking brandy, their children excited to be out of bed to see such a late hour. A handful of people stood on deck, shivering and watched the scene, most amused. Violet shook from the cold as rain now drizzled in the air. She cradled Sylvia into her chest.

''Let me speak to the man.'' He angrily told Sylvia. Harry wasn't unreasonable very often, nor did he raise his voice but this time there was need; the last thing they wanted was to catch their deaths. Harry approached Thomas Andrews, a man he had seen about at dinner, they had nodded to the other as gentleman did but that was as far as it had gone.

''Excuse me, Mr Andrews?''

As he turned, Harry saw the droop of his eyes, how sullen, almost drained they looked.

''Yes?''

''I have my wife and infant daughter here, all out of bed and in the cold. Is there a need? Can this not wait until morning?''

''Mr?-''

''Evans. Harry.'

Mr. Andrews allowed his eyes to travel to the petite woman behind him, cradling a sleeping child. He nodded. ''Mr. Evans, we will not be aboard by morning, as the ship will sink.''

Harry felt his stomach fall. He needed to grasp something to stop his legs shaking. ''Sink? But we struck a little ice?'' He laughed to lighten the mood. Or calm his nerves.

'Yes. Water is filling the lower decks as we speak.'' He glanced at this young man family once more. ''I do not wish to cause panic but get your wife and child on one of these lifeboats immediately. In one or two hours, the ship will be beneath the sea.''

Harry turned to Violet, his beautiful wife. He was now going to have to explain to her that he would have to be separated from them. He felt his heart beating faster than it had before. In any given moment, he would awaken, naked beside his wife after their passionate embrace and this would just be a dull memory. Of course, that moment didn't come.

Violet blanked out the screams as she cradled her daughter so tightly. There must have been hundreds of bodies in the water, all splashing, screaming and crying out for help. But who could save them? ''Darling, Harry, please see me soon.'' She whispered. Praying Harry was aboard another lifeboat,

''We have to go back. We have room for dozens more.'' A woman raised her voice. ''Look at those people, they will die out there!''

Violet squeezed her eyes closed. Her shivers now controlled her entire body. If this was the cold she felt then the people in the water would be in mass pain.

''We can't go back. The boat will be swamped.'' The quartermaster told her, forcefully.

The woman's eyes bore into him, before glancing about the boat for support. ''Come on, its' your men out there.''

The boat was silent, nobody spoke.

''Do you want to live or die? They will take us right under with the damned suction. We have to keep rowing.''

The woman sat down defeated, pulling her shawl further over her body. Violet found the strength to open her eyes. The Titanic had gone, sunk...leaving a trail of bodies in its wake.

Harry had held onto Sylvia tightly as they had formed a crowd around the lifeboats. He rocked her, cuddled her to him and watched her sweet little face. ''Just think of it as an adventure. You can be my little sailor.'' He talked to Sylvia as though she understood. ''We will all be back on board by breakfast and laughing about this at the dinner table.''

Violet shook from the cold. She clutched Harry's arm tightly. Turning to him, she looked him straight in the eye. ''No, I know that's not the truth. The ship will sink.''

Harry closed his eyes for a moment. ''Yes.'' He couldn't lie. ''Its why we must get you and Sylvia to safety.''

Violet shook her head, violently. ''I am not going in one of those boats without you. We are a family. They will see that.''

''No, darling. Women and children are the only ones to board.''

The words hit her like a train, knocking the wind from her lungs. She felt he tears come to her eyes. She couldn't leave him. ''No.''

''Yes, that is how it will have to be.''

He placed his index finger on her chin as he always did. ''Vi, I love you, I will not be parted from you very long.''

Tears fell from her eyes and it was the first time she had shed a tear in such a public place. As she glanced about, fathers hugged their wives and children. She clutched her stomach. ''No.'' She repeated.

''Yes, think of our darling daughter. She needs you very much, to be strong.''

''But we need you, too.''

She turned back to see the lifeboat been filled. Women separated from their husbands, their lovers, to go aboard a tiny, unsafe boat. In slow motion, they were pulled by officers, helped into the boat, children followed; babies, toddlers, teenagers. Some were happy to be having an adventure, others hysterically cried for their father. She placed her hands-on Harry's chest to steady herself.

''But, you must come.'' She pleaded.

''I will get on the next boat, I promise. There aren't so many women and children, here. I will be along right after you.'

Violet heard his voice; how serious he was and yet somehow her faith in him wavered.

''Step aboard, Madam.'' She felt a hand clutch her shoulder. She turned to see an officer was ushering her to the front of the queue.

''Oh, but a moment.'' It happened so fast she couldn't even comprehend it. Harry had kissed Sylvia's forehead before tenderly kissing Violet and then she was thrust aboard a rickety boat with her baby in her arms. The gap between the ship and the lifeboat was frightening and within seconds she was amongst a mass of women and children waving goodbye.

"Quickly, ladies, get into the boat!" Officer Lightoller ushered more people aboard.

"Harry, please, get into the boat!" she shouted at him, tears streaming down her face. Fearing it would be the final time in her life that she saw him.

"Don't worry about me, darling. I'm a good swimmer, remember?" He smiled at her reassuringly, but inside he was dying. It was all a rush and a blur.

"Lower away!" Lightoller called.

Harry watched as the boat began to descend. The ropes were going through the pulleys as the seamen started to lower it.

Lightoller shouted, giving out orders, but all of Violet's senses disappeared and all she could hear was her blood pounding in her ears. _This cannot be happening_. A rocket burst above in slow motion, outlining Harry in a halo of light. Violet's hair blew in the wind as she gazed up at him, descending away from him. She saw his hand trembling, the tears at the corners of his eyes, and could not believe the unbearable pain she was feeling. She could make out his lips moving, mouthing the words _I love you_. And he did, so much so that putting her on that boat was killing him but he had put her life and their daughters first and he always would.

Harry knew he was alone now. He would have to find a way to save himself now, to see his family again, but for now, he wouldn't waste his last view of her. He had to see her until he couldn't anymore.


End file.
